Its time? Its time.

More sobering conversations have been taking place at work recently, especially in light of the fact that the Office isn't really going to stand for very much longer.

A tentative date of the 31st of October has been set for the end of it all but other whispers have set the tone and the end of it all by the end of this month. So its Hari Kemerdekaan (Independence Day) for Malaysia and in a way, I am free too. And what then? What is next in store for Poet?

Miss Nonya has kindly advised that she could look at putting in resumes on my behalf and let me know about available openings. She had also asked me to go back and hit the books and do a bit of revision just to make sure that I'm still legit and that I can still do the things that Physio School has taught me so that when hospitals interview me, they will still probably see that I'm still okay to practise. After that, its just general ward management again and the whole shebang.

Gwendola stated in a matter-of-factly way that my current position with this Office allows me to be paid quite handsomely and so when I do go and look for a job, I should not be keeping an eye out for big paychecks. I won't be getting all the perks that I am probably used to having with this job. I'm spoilt.

But I am lucky to have gotten this job and to have gotten this training. I am lucky to have had the experience of visiting Israel and London and living the life there and being able to touch the Wailing Wall. I am lucky and humbled and thankful for the twists and turns that Fate and that the Big Guy up there had provided whilst I have been here.

But things are getting a little bit hazy. And I feel as though I am running out of places to run.

So I guess it is time. It is time that I start dusting off the book covers and that I start taking out my notes and doing a bit of revision. I need to move out of the place I'm living in and find somewhere cheaper to live that does not drain my wallet so much. I need to find a place that allows me to live a bit healthier so that I do not end up stress eating the wrong foods all the time. I need to find a schedule that works for me that I would be  at least happier with what is going on now.

I need to renew my practising licence with the NZSP.

You know what? I have survived so much. I have survived so much. And as much as I have a death wish of kicking it by 40, I'll be DAMNED if I can't make it through this now.