Reality.

I think sometimes, this is what we're left with.

You finish and stop at the end of your life and you're stuck with this. So...you spent your life pursuing a degree that you didn't really need. Or want. What now?

I remind myself constantly of that fact and there are people out there who would tell me, "Stop whining and do something the fuck up about it." I would love to do what the poster says. To go out and see the world. Travel. Do the things I love and find the love of my life at the end of it all. Get lost to find myself. Life is about the people you meet.

I want to dance in the dusty streets of Argentina or share a beer with Cubans on Varadero Beach. Live it up all night long doing rumbas and having awesome reggaeton parties. I want to live the bohemian life on the streets of Paris and hitchhike across the great US of A. I want to daydream on the islands of Tahiti and drink the morning dew of a jungle morning.

So why am I here, at the daily 9 to 5 grind? I dunno. Meh.

I was reading the good ole' food blogs that I used to love reading because it inspired me and told me that you know, cooking isn't just for the chefs. And you know what? I despise the fact that I don't live life like them.

Yeah. Call me jealous. Yeah. Whatever.

Because you don't always get to cook food at home.

Because sometimes, during the 9 to 5 grind, I don't come home, melt a golden pat of butter in the pan and 10mins later, serve a deliciously flaky, herb-flavoured fish fillet with a garden salad and a red wine.

Dinner tends to look like what I took away from lunch. Because its convenient. Because when I get home too late, all the food places are closed and then I'll have to resort to having a flipping McDonald's salad for dinner just because I'm still trying to watch my weight. Meh.




And best of all, I have dinner. At work.

Yes, I'm complaining. And yes, Imma spoilt brat. Nothing new there, right?

There's been quite a few changes at work recently and my list of responsibilities have been upgraded. Lovely. Had a meeting today with the Head Clinician and had a good rant. Maybe its an English problem or whatever but he said some things that did piss me off but oh well. Everyone's telling me to look for a job and keep my eyes open for something new. It might be time.

Saw an acquaintance post this up and I nod my agreement with every word I read.

Sometimes, I am glad the passion is gone. I think I will be happy if I no longer have to deal with this. Sometimes, the whole reason for it does not even matter any more.

I can't wait til it is over. Because I think its dead.